A Birthmother’s Adoption Plan

Expectant mother in an open adoption

The hospital stay can be a scary prospect for a birth mother intending on placing their child for adoption. It represents the place where they will give birth to a child they will not be bringing home with them, as well as representing the place they will part with their child. This makes an adoption plan essential, as it helps to demystify and clarify what will happen and when and how. In this article, we’ll be taking a closer look at the creation of an adoption hospital plan. 

What is an Adoption Hospital Plan?

An adoption hospital plan is typically a list of documents that feature the birth mother’s preferences for the hospital stay and giving birth. It helps avoid any confusion or unwanted scenarios when the time comes, allowing the birth mother to solely focus on giving birth to the baby.

Have a Conversation

Your first step should be to talk with the prospective adoptive parents before your due date. It is best if this is done in person, but can also be undertaken through phone calls or emails. You should talk about aspects of the hospital stay in detail, such as:

  • Do you wish for the adoptive parents to be present at the birth?
  • Let them know who out of your own support network you’ll be bringing to the birth
  • Decide who will hold the baby first, and how much time you’ll feel you’ll need to spend with your baby
  • Do you want pictures taken with you and your baby?
  • Who will keep the hospital mementos, such as the ID bracelet, baby blanket, hat, and so forth? 

Openness

It is important to keep your conversations with the adoptive parents open. Try not to be shy and ask all the questions that you need to. Check that everyone is on the same page when it comes to the hospital stay to prevent any confusion or distractions when the time comes. 

Labor and Delivery

It goes without saying that one of the biggest parts of adoption is the birth itself. You need to prepare for this by considering every option you might face. You can choose between a natural birth or having an epidural, and depending on health factors and your situation you might be offered an elective c-section. Prepare yourself for these possibilities, and factor in your recovery time post birth, and any implications procedures might have. 

When it comes to the birth, the most important thing to keep in mind is that you may need to remain flexible. Some things that you may have a preference on may need to change out of medical necessity.

Planning Ahead

When it comes to creating an adoption plan, it is important to keep communication open and ensure all your questions are answered before your due date. Some adoptive parents may be excited and overager and try to impose some of their wants and wishes upon you and the hospital stay/birth. It is important you voice your wants and needs clearly and remember that the hospital stay is about the needs of you and your child, and not those of the adoptive parents. Ultimately, the goal is for the birth to be as stress free and positive as possible for you.

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Angel Adoption, Inc. provides marketing and advertising services that assist biological parents considering adoption and prospective adoptive parents to connect with each other, and provides support and referral services throughout the process. Angel Adoption, Inc. is an independent contractor and provides services under the supervision of Lutheran Child and Family Services of Illinois, License #012998, One Oakbrook Terrace, #501, Oakbrook Terrace, IL 60181; 708-771-7180.