Birthmothers who are weighing their options and thinking about choosing parenting over adoption are facing a life-changing decision. Maybe you feel totally alone at this time, but you shouldn’t. There are millions of women who have been and are currently in your shoes. Choosing between adoption and parenting is not easy, but a list of things to think about when considering parenting a baby might help you to find the best solution for you and your baby.
The first thing to do is consider your options and take some time to think. Do some soul-searching and ask yourself what the consequences of each option you have. Make a list of pros and cons for adoption and parenting. Take as much time as you need to figure out what is the best solution for you and your baby. Don’t rush this decision, and don’t let anyone force you into doing something you’re not comfortable with.
You need to know that you are not alone and you don’t need to go through this alone. Talk with your friends and family about your feelings on parenthood. If you don’t feel comfortable talking to your friends or family members, consider searching online for people with a similar situation as yours online through blogs and web-pages, or feel free to contact us anytime — we have birthmother coordinators standing by 24/7 to discuss your options in a totally non-biased and non-judgemental environment.
Are you ready to become a parent? This is a serious question and both your feelings and life circumstances will play a role in the decision you make. Remember that parenting is for a lifetime and the decision affects two lives: yours and your baby’s. Look at the situation from every angle as you decide if you’re ready to become a parent.
Ask yourself the following questions:
- Am I financially ready to raise a child? This is important to consider. Raising a baby is expensive, and there are also expenses like hospital trips and prenatal care you need to factor in. Will you be able to handle these expenses?
- What are my future goals and aspirations? This decision will change your life. If you choose to parent your baby, it’s possible you’ll need to postpone your education or career goals. Are you willing to do that if necessary?
- What kind of like do I want for my child? Sometimes, a woman may choose not to parent because she knows she will not be able to provide the life she dreams for her child.
- Will you have to rely on family and friends to help? Think about what family and friends who’d be able and willing to help you. Consider whether you’re comfortable with this.
- Do you want a child’s father to be involved? If he is not going to be involved, many women choose adoption because they feel strongly that their baby grow up with two positive parent role models. Given your current relationship with your baby’s father, how do you feel about this?
Answer these questions honestly and consider your reflections. Deciding on adoption or parenting is not an easy choice. Just remember to listen to yourself and if you need any help you can contact us anytime to help you with your decision. In the end, the decision is yours and yours alone.