Meeting Potential Adoptive Parents

Adoptive parents chatting with expectant mother

Placing your child for adoption can be a daunting experience. You may have a mixture of emotions including anxiety and fear, especially when the time comes to meet the child’s adoptive parents. You may ask yourself many questions and stress over small details. How then, you might ask, should you prepare and go about meeting your child’s parents? Let’s look at some helpful tips.

Be Yourself

The pressure might be high to want to impress adoptive parents. You might be nervous that they may not like you and that it may not be the best connection. Instead of worrying about things that you can’t change, you should try to be yourself. Keep calm and open with them and assume that they are receptive to your honesty. Being honest also goes a long way to show that you can be trusted.

Before we enter into any commitment, we try to make sure that we trust the people asking for commitment. Adoption is a life-long commitment that you should only enter into if you can trust the other party. So be open and honest, and look for the other party to do the same.

Ask Questions

You are going to the meeting to let the adoptive parents get to meet you, but you should also get to know about them. You can only know all there is to know if you ask questions without holding any back. You don’t want to be in a situation where after the adoption, you start having second thoughts, wondering if you did the right thing because you weren’t sure. Participating in the selection process by asking questions gives you a sense of peace and assuredness. 

Asking a lot of questions to the adoptive parents will not only help you to learn more about your child’s future, but it will also help you to form a connection with them. If there’s no connection there, then you can move on and look for another possible match.

Choose a Neutral Setting 

Because these are people that you’ll be meeting for the very first time, you should aim to be as comfortable as possible. Avoid hosting them in your home or meeting them in their house and instead find a neutral place so it’s relaxed and comfortable.

A simple meeting over a cup of coffee or lunch can help everyone to feel relaxed, and this will help conversations to flow more easily. The idea is to get as comfortable as possible in order to talk freely without fear of being judged.

How to Prepare for the Meeting

When going to meet your adoptive parents, you should try to keep it simple in everything from dressing to location and even to conversation. You don’t want to be the least bit uncomfortable for this important meeting. Put your best foot forward and be confident in yourself. Most importantly you want to smile and be yourself. You may be surprised at how open and welcoming the potential adoptive parents are when they see you.

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Angel Adoption, Inc. provides marketing and advertising services that assist biological parents considering adoption and prospective adoptive parents to connect with each other, and provides support and referral services throughout the process. Angel Adoption, Inc. is an independent contractor and provides services under the supervision of Lutheran Child and Family Services of Illinois, License #012998, One Oakbrook Terrace, #501, Oakbrook Terrace, IL 60181; 708-771-7180.