How it All Began...
Why did you choose to work with Angel Adoption?
We were referred to Angel Adoption by another agency that couldn’t take on any more clients at the time. We ultimately chose to work with Angel because of their success rate with LGBT adoptions.
What were you most excited about?
We were most excited about finally taking that first step towards building our family. We couldn’t wait to get “The Call!”
What were you most nervous about?
We were most nervous about the wait and what would happen if we didn’t get chosen.
How did your friends and family react to your decision to adopt?
Everyone was super excited for us. No one was surprised because everyone always knew from the beginning that we would adopt.
What was it like meeting your daughter’s birthmother for the first time?
Meeting our daughter’s birthmother was like going on a blind date. We were connected with her two months before the baby was due, so we had a little time to get to know each other. Before we met, we emailed daily and got to know each other really well.
Did you choose an open or closed adoption?
When we started the process, we originally chose to have a semi-open or closed adoption because we were not sure what open adoption actually looked like. After a few months of working with Angel and talking with other adoptive families, some of whom had used Angel, we decided that open adoption was the best option for everyone involved, especially our future child.
Describe receiving the call that an expectant mother had chosen you.
The day we got the call was a pretty special day! It was July 7, 2017, and we were at the 14-month mark of our wait. We were starting to worry that it wasn’t going to happen, and we had just decided to book a trip to Florida to see Brandon’s parents in October. When we saw the name and number on the caller ID, Brandon jumped up and answered quickly. We found out we were picked by an expectant mother who was due in September. It was a great day! We immediately called our parents!
Describe the experience of finally meeting your baby.
One of the most special things about this experience was that Brandon and his mom were able to go up to our birthmother’s home state a week before the baby was born. They attended doctor’s appointments with her and even rushed to the hospital twice for false alarm pre-labor. John stayed back home to take care of the dogs until it was time. When the call finally came at 2:30 a.m. on September 9th, Brandon and his mom rushed across town, picked up our birthmother, and headed to labor and delivery. Brandon and his mom were in the delivery room for the birth. Brandon acted as our birthmother’s coach and support system. He even got to cut the umbilical cord when our daughter Lorelai was born! We had not known the sex of the baby until that very moment!
What is your relationship like with your daughter’s birthmother?
We have a great relationship with Lorelai’s birthmother. We continue to text daily and consider her part of our family. Without her we wouldn’t be daddies, so we have a high amount of respect for her.
What were the biggest challenges of the adoption process?
The waiting is the hardest part. If we could offer anyone some advice it would be to trust the process and trust the people you hired to help your dream come true. Never be afraid to reach out to them to vent or just ask questions.
Adopting a baby can be a lengthy process — how did you get through the wait?
We bought a house during our wait, so decorating took some time, and we even took a lot of time to make the nursery exactly what we wanted.
Would you adopt again? Why or why not?
If the time was right we would definitely adopt again. It’s a costly process, so we will see if we are ever able to financially do it again. Right now, we are so happy with our family of three that a second adoption isn’t on our minds.
Do you have any advice to share with other adoptive parents?
Find a support group! We found one on Facebook that’s super positive. Also, connect with other families that have been through this process because they are the only ones who will understand it. It’s easy to get caught up in the adoption wait and time frame, so don’t hold onto those feelings. It will only make things harder. We are so thankful to the families we connected with through Angel that were always there to offer support.