How it All Began...
How did you decide to adopt a baby?
I’ve always wanted to be a mom. I was divorced and Mr. Right wasn’t showing up at my door. I didn’t want to get into a relationship that wasn’t right just to have a baby. I wanted my baby to have as stable a family as I could provide.
Why did you choose to work with Angel Adoption?
I have several friends that have adopted through various agencies. I asked a few friends and they had heard of Angel Adoption. I found them through a Google search, and I really liked their placement rate. My success is their success. So, if they are willing to work with me, they are the experts and know what potential birthmothers are looking for.
What were you most excited about?
I was most excited about success, becoming a mom.
How did your friends and family react to your decision to adopt?
Everyone was extremely supportive. They were also surprised because my close family wasn’t even aware of my decision until I had my baby in my arms. The support I received was overwhelming. Family, friends, neighbors, co-workers, and friends of friends were so generous and thoughtful.
What was it like meeting your daughter’s birthmother for the first time?
I was really nervous. I didn’t know what to expect. She was very nice and super conflicted with her decision. She felt better after she met me and my parents.
Did you choose an open or closed adoption? How did you make that decision?
Open. I always want my daughter to know where she came from and to know her story, which makes her who she is. She has siblings she may want to meet someday. My friend has three adopted children, each with different situations. One is really open where the family is close with the extended family. I like this and would be open to that with my daughter.
Describe receiving the call that your baby was being born and traveling to meet her.
I was shocked. I had no idea anyone was even considering me. I remember exactly what happened. At my desk on a Monday morning, my phone rang. I didn’t know the number, so I let it go to voicemail. Then I got a text with a few details about a baby born in Texas. I was so surprised. I listened to the message and then called my mom. My mom told me to talk to the birthmother and see how she sounded. I was a little skeptical because I had heard so many stories. I was also really excited and nervous. I went home at lunch and called the birthmom. She was so sweet and even asked if I had picked out a name. I booked airfare for the first flight out the next morning and my parents and I flew to Texas. At about noon on Tuesday, I was holding my baby.
Describe the experience of finally meeting your baby.
I was so nervous. I had no notice and no planning. We got to the hospital and all of the nurses knew who I was. They were all very sweet. Even seven months later, it seems like a dream. It all happened so fast. Sometimes I just stare at her because I can’t believe it.
What is your relationship like with your daughter’s birthmother?
I told her the first time we talked, “I am open for whatever relationship works for you.” She has two other young children that are currently unaware of their sister. She is going to school and raising the two little ones on her own. I wait for her to reach out when she is ready. If she reaches out, I am happy to send photos or updates. I know she thinks about the baby often, and I think about her every day too. She has made my dreams come true. I want her to know that her baby is well taken care of and happy.
What were the biggest challenges of the adoption process?
For me, the biggest challenge was the fact that I didn’t know anything until after my daughter was born. Although, I also think that was a blessing as well. I know I would have worried about everything leading up to her birth. Waiting in Texas for clearance to leave was a challenge, but the process went really smoothly.
Adopting a baby can be a lengthy process — how did you get through the wait?
I honestly tried not to think about it. I planned and took vacations and went about life. My friend was convinced I would hear something in February, a month that I had planned two vacations. I normally wouldn’t have taken two vacations in one year like I had scheduled. She was sure that I was going to have to cancel. February and my vacations came and went — still no news. When June hit and I hadn’t heard anything, I was starting to get nervous. I was halfway through the contract. Then my daughter was born on June 19.
Would you adopt again? Why or why not?
Yes, I would consider adopting again, and I would use Angel Adoption. I was happy to see the reports of how many times my profile was sent out or viewed. I got the feeling they were working for me. I had a positive experience. It was a thrill and I would do it all over again. My only worry is that I am a little older than the typical mother.
What advice do you have to share with other adoptive parents?
I would say, listen to your heart. You know what is right for you. Family and friends may think they know best, but only you know what is right for you. Listen to what others say, but do with it what you want. Everyone will have advice and give opinions, but stick to what you think is right. I didn’t buy anything until I had the baby in my arms. We needed a car seat and other things. We went to the hospital first, and then to the store. My daughter was nine pounds when she was born, almost the size of some three-month-old babies. I needed that information before buying clothes and diapers. It was hard not to go crazy, but whatever we bought we knew we were going to have to get home. I have heard stories about single mothers that want to adopt, but their families are not supportive. If this is something you feel you want to do, go for it! There are lots of options to have a child. Good and bad…..everything happens for a reason.