How it All Began...
How did you decide to adopt a baby?
After discovering we would not be able to have children biologically, we decided adoption was going to be our way of building a family. It was always an option in our hearts, and we could not be more grateful for the opportunity to grow our family through the beautiful adoption process.
Why did you choose to work with Angel Adoption?
After doing the necessary research as we began our adoption journey, we landed with Angel because of the positive reviews we read. Although the process can seem very overwhelming at first, it was comforting to learn about all the amazing experiences families have had working with Angel Adoption. Everything fell into place at the right time for us, and we were thrilled to begin our journey with Angel Adoption.
What were your feelings as you began your adoption journey?
As we began our adoption journey, we certainly experienced feelings of anxiety because of the unknown aspects of the process. However, our adoption coordinators were extremely helpful in educating us, providing us with hope, and keeping us at ease throughout. We wanted the process to happen as efficiently and smoothly as possible, so we took the steps to stay on top of our education classes and learn as much as we could about the process right from the start. It is especially important to find patience within the adoption journey, and looking back, it all happened so fast for us.
How did your friends and family react to your decision to adopt?
We decided to take a more unique approach and only tell our parents about our decision to adopt. They were extremely supportive throughout the process. We wanted to wait to tell everybody else until after the adoption was finalized. After we adopted our son, it was fun being able to surprise everybody, and they were all incredibly excited for us. It was the shocker of the decade but a positive, excited shock for everybody. Our loved ones couldn’t be happier for us, and they knew we would be amazing parents since we have been so great at helping others with their children.
What was it like meeting the birthmother for the first time?
We had talked for about six weeks through texts and phone calls before meeting in person, so it came very naturally when we met face to face. It was about a six-hour drive for us, and we could not be more excited to finally get to see each other. Meeting her in person allowed us to finally put a face with the voice, and it helped us connect with each other on a different level. We met not only our son’s birthmother but her other children as well. When we first met in person, it was actually at the hospital where she would be having our baby. We toured the OB together, and this helped break the ice. Afterward, we went out to lunch together and did other activities around the area for the rest of the day. We connected with our son’s birthmother in early April, so we had the amazing opportunity to walk alongside her journey through the majority of her pregnancy. We talked nearly every single day!
Did you choose an open or closed adoption? How did you make that decision?
We were open minded when it came to the type of communication we would have with our son’s birthmother. It was important for us to give her the opportunity to choose the type of communication she would like and then take it from there. Although we only met in person once at the hospital, we engaged in many different types of communication together throughout her pregnancy—calls, texts, letters, and Facebook. She requested an open adoption plan, and we were so excited to grant that wish for her. She made our dream of becoming a family come true and helped us build the family we have always wanted!
Describe receiving the call that your baby was being born and the experience of finally meeting him.
We were so excited when we received the call! Our dream was finally coming true. Right when we got the call from our son’s birthmother, we took off and drove to the hospital to be there with her and meet our new son, Mckoy. The experience was amazing. Our birthmother was induced, and we were beside her for all 19 hours of labor. During that time, we had the opportunity to bond with the birth parents in the delivery room. The feelings we had when first seeing our baby are indescribable. It was so special being able to be there for the delivery. We heard our Mckoy’s first cry, and we got to cut the cord and immediately engage in skin-to-skin contact. The tears of joy ran down my face. Although we felt sadness for Mckoy’s birthmother, we felt more at ease when she expressed she knew choosing adoption was a good choice for her.
What is your relationship like with your baby’s birthmother?
Our relationship with Mckoy’s birthmother is amazing. We are extremely close and still talk daily. We are her biggest cheerleaders on days when she needs some extra support, and we love sharing photos with her.
What were the biggest challenges of the adoption process?
Patience can be a hard concept to grasp, but is necessary to get a hold of it when going through the adoption process. Additionally, it is important to find understanding for a birthmother and her way of life. Things do not always work the way we want them to, and waiting for a birthmother’s response for a couple days can be nerveracking. You must have faith in the entire process and know it will all work out in the end if it is meant to be.
Adoption can be a lengthy process — how did you get through the wait?
In order to get through the wait, we ensured we stayed busy. Keeping busy is what saved us. “It is in God’s hands” was my motto throughout the entire process. We were blessed to have adopted within a year and to connect very early on in the birthmother’s pregnancy. It is extremely helpful to build a strong connection with the birthmother from the get-go.
Would you adopt again? Why or why not?
We would definitely consider adoption again. We would love to have a sibling for Mckoy in the future once he gets a little older. The experience was such a blessing for us, and our hearts feel so full.
What advice do you have to share with other adoptive parents?
Have faith and patience, be yourself, and stay positive. It is the most amazing feeling in the world holding your child for the first time.